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Happy days
Hey all you bloggers out there. It's the last week of the holidays. Quick right? Can't believe we only have 10 days off. The next term vacay will be in June I think. I haven't even finished my holiday assignments yet. Haven't even started on em. I think I'll start doing Maths first. Might as well get the hardest one done first. Suffer first, enjoy later...well sort off~

Today was quite relaxing. Went by baby's house for abit just now in the afternoon. His mom got me this jubah from Mekah. Really comfy I tell you, though abit hot, its comfy. Woke up just in time for me to take a shower and be on my way. Haven't been feeling too well lately though. Been feeling quite heaty~ Oh well..Oh yeah. I just got done watching Bride Wars. BF bought the dvd with me just now. Quite fun..how love can actually turn out that way. The twist in the story was fantastic. I wont ruin the story for all of yalls who haven't watched it though. All I can say is this, GREATEST CHICK FLICK OF THE YEAR.

Speaking of love, one of my friends called me up yesterday with a very interesting dilemma. It's a situation where maybe most or some of you have been in before. It's quite an interesting one too in a sense that..we just don't know where these feelings actually come from and how it all developes all over again. Ok..main characters of the story is her and her ex-boyfriend. Well..they started off real well actually before.

Both of em were totally in love until things went wrong. They just weren't ready yet. They just weren't mature enough for it. Come to think of it, none of us were actually mature enough for a relationship yet cos I was too at a turning point in my relationship. Well, they broke up and after a year or more, which is now, they finally got to talking again. Before they got to talking again, it was so fuckin dramatic. One of depressed and the other one was fronting and shit..you know men and their 'pride'.

Well, she called yesterday and it turns out, they started talking again and stuff, then the subject of their past came up. He confessed that he regrets his decision of letting her go and how hard it was to actually let her go. They were kinda like a Kate Hudson and Owen Willis thing. If you don't know who they are, go look em up on google. They had this on and off thing goin on and yeah, from what I can tell from both of em, my friend and her ex I mean, communication is the thing that held both of them together. Whenever they got back to talking, the love came back.

Basically, she's confused on whether or not she should keep her distance. Since he is in a relationship, it makes things so much harder to work out. All the advice I could give her is to let whatever that's gonna happen, just happen. There's no use in hiding her feelings and try to push it away when it's never gonna go anywhere. She tried pushing away the last time and here it is back again. The fact that he has a girlfriend, well that's another issue. Yeah, it's mean steppin on people, but hey, who are we to stop fate from happening? If it happens, it just happens. When I tell her to let fate decide, I mean it that way. I'm not asking her to try ruining someone else's relationship though.

It's not like I'm asking her to throw herself at him and go all lovey-dovey straight away. They're only friends at this point...just you know..with something special in that particular bond. Oh well, we'll see what happens. I do wish her luck though..I've been in her position before and when things don't work out...it doesn't usually turn out good...nyeh.


til tomorrow peoples! Ciao Bello!













&&exclusivelyy

Holidays!

The net hurts.
I do hate the internet sometimes and advertisements too. They make me want things I may never have :( I strongly dislike looking at something I wish I had. It just aches me so bad. Puts a huge wrinkle on mi forehead. My most recents wants is the Nokia 5800 Xpress Music. I thought that the N97 was gonna be the only touch screen Nokia phone, but to my surprise, my mom had to see the 5800's ad and told me to search it online. Hell!! It was like an iPhone...but so so so much better!! I don't really know if its better than the N97 or not, but shit...its really nice.

I wasn't really feeling the whole design of the phone, but ok..scratch everything I said. I shall wait for the N97! Fuck shit, excuse mi french, but I just saw the most azmazing phone..EVER! Its like a cross between the LG Prada, ofcourse and N-series lookalike and the iPhone. It is a definite treasure! I'm aiming for that one gadget. Can't wait for it to come out. Bet the price on this one aint gon be merciful. A phone like that? Pfft~

From what I heard the last time I asked about it, it'll be released around late July or August. I can't friggin wait!!! It knocks the iPhone right outta the ball park. Hope my dad gets it..well for me ofcourse..not my mom~ Hopefully she gets the 5800 instead *evil grins*

The silver one looks fantastic, whereas the black one, in my opinion is a little blah. Its sorta like a laptop that fits right into your pockets. I recommend you guys to search it up and drool over this kick ass treasure. I actually wanted to get this phone last year when my N95 got totalled, but yeah since it only comes out this year around July or August, I stuck with the N96. Its more or less like the N95, but has a sleeker design. Nokia's phones have recently been lacking in the design area, but someone decided to use his/her brain and designed this unique phone! Yeah the design does look a lil bit like the other phones in the N-series range, but its wayy more sleeker.

Sorry if I'm abit obssessed over this gadget, but I haven't seen it yet. Me, being the moderately slow person that I am, just thought of serching its images up on google. Anyways~~~~

On other events in my life...College has finally started just now. It was kinda tiring. First day and the assignments are already pouring. Business studies was a complete bore. I felt like I made a HUGE mistake. Should've gone for like Geo or something. Or maybe change my lecturer. She sounded like she either didn't get any sleep the last night or someone just aint gettin nuff lovin at home. Sad how sometimes people make it so obvious that they hate their life. So far, no drama in college yet, Thank GOD!

Searching for my classes weren't that bad. I managed to follow the map surprisingly cos I found it kinda complicated to understand at first, but I found my classes and my teachers so its all good. BF brought me lunch and it was sweet. The day went pretty well today. My ASL class got cancelled today so I got to hang out at the BF's house. :)

Now I'm on my way to bed. Will blog maybe tomorrow so ciao bello!!!










&&drama drama drama

Orientation on Monday...
I just got my college folder. I got accepted~ Monday's gonna be orientation day. It goes on for 3 days so normal lessons will start only on Thursday. Its gonna be a long ass day. On the third day, we'll have to wear our sport attires as there will be activities for us. Don't know what kind of activites, but just a wild guess...sports? *sense the sarcasm*

The BF has been worrying a lot lately as college will take up abit of our time. When I say 'our' I mean it'll take up our time spent together. College starts at 7.30am and ends around 3 in the afternoon. If there are any other activities like meetings or shit like that, we'll probably have to stay til 4.30 or later which sucks real bad.

The whole folder includes various forms and the ever boring 'rule book'. It says we're not allowed out during PS (Private Study) and blah blah blah. Scary to me at first cos it seemed sooo strict, but I guess you just have to get used to the college and learn the ropes. Then it'll be all good. Kinda nervous about orientation though. A lot of my friends are going to Katok which sucks. I don't even know how I got into my college. I heard from the BF's dad that my house isn't in the school's area range. I'm supposed to be going to Katok as well, but this college will do just fine.

A lot of pressure though from my dad. He keeps going on and on about my study habits and shit. Time management..blah blah..time management..blah blah...TIME MANAGEMENT..blah blah bloody blah!

Everything's sorta pressing me down. Everyone's not really helping me with college. TIME TIME TIME~! Everything concerns time. Not enough time spent with him..Not enough time spent on my studies..Not enough time spent outdoors. What the hell...seems like 24 hours just isn't enough for one day. Why 24 hours?! Why can't it be more? I haven't even started college yet and things are already fuckin stressful.

I just don't need no drama when I start off college. None of that socializing bullshit. Dealt with it since Form 1 and I aint bringing my highschool nightmares to college. No way in hell, point blank.

Today was the same as yesterday except my dad changed my lights. He bought and installed this amazing-looking chandelier in my bedroom. Since my old lights weren't bright enough for my room and the bulbs weren't the energy-saving types, he changed the whole damn thing. My room is now bright as hell. Thank god its brightness can be adjusted. It looks like a mini version of the one that hangs on the living room ceiling. VERY pretty~ I didn't really think that it would be that beautiful, but shit, I underestimated my dad real bad.

Now I'll finally be able to enjoy the brightness of my room. Try changing the amount of light in your room. It actually changes the way you look at it. Looks better when its bright. It actually depends on your taste. If you like things a lil bit darker then you might like your room without so much light...if not then yeah like me, you love the light. I hate the dark. Phobia~ I am sinking in shame...~

Anyways..I shall sign off here. Ciao readers.









&&shine baby shine!

What if I didn't need it?
What if I didn't need all the shit that has been put right out in front of me? Would I be happier living life the way it should be? No luxury..Just flat out normal life. No fake smiles, no curfews, no intense drama...Just plain ol' life.

Would it be much easier or just abit TOO easy? I sometimes ponder on the fact that maybe life is easy. But its just the person who's living it that makes it harder. The world is God's little prison for us. We serve our sentence and he decides when our times are up. Just like normal prison, we usually stay long enough to have met wonderful people called friends and maybe even find that special someone. Drama occurs every now and then..some are worked out, some just left to dangle for a lifetime.

Enemies are made and hatred is formed. All part of the wonderful experience called life. Not one of us can escape any of its processes. But aint it a shame for those who get pulled out of it so quickly. You never know just when your time's up. It could be any day or any minute. Most of us are afraid of death itself. I've heard this timelessly 'Death is but a gift from God'. Is it really? For those who have lived a harsh life, they will agree to this immediately, but for those who have lived life in its lushness will think before agreeing to this quote.

The loss of a loved one..is amazingly far greater than any other emotion. Though the thought of them finally receiving an eternity of happiness is an enjoyable one. I've heard stories and theories on how heaven is like and how the 'end of the world' or 'apocalypse' as some may call it, is near. When does it happen? How does it happen and what will really happen? I myself is afraid of death itself. But the end of days? I dare not even question its reality.

I aim to fulfill as much of my goals in life as time permits. Everyone does too actually. Fear is one of the many thoughts or emotion that holds us back from really fulfilling most things we want to do in life. I try hard not to let it get in my way and although it does occasionally, I do not let it get in the way of the things that matter most to me in my life. We all want to be a better person in life. Almost everyone wants life in its best quality, but what if we can't have it? What if..it isn't what God has planned for us? Sucks doesn't it when the thing you want just can't be taken nor bought. Frustrating, really.

A family with 2 children. A good husband. A nice house. Home will sound as sweet as it did almost 10 years ago. That is what I want in life. Hopefully in the near future I'll get it...yes hope. Hope is what all of us can do for things we are not sure of. Faith is another important value in life. Having faith will crush some of our hearts at times, but at most..it keeps us from the negativity life may bring. Negativity isn't one of the things I try to take in. All it does is create more pain and worries for me.

Moping over the same shit time and time again. A waste of time..that's what it is. I do appreciate a little time spent alone at home from time to time. But I really just wanna get out there and see the world. Travel..meet new people and breath in the intoxicated air that surrounds the world. Pollution is one of the poisons in life. Can we escape it? Unfortunately not. As long as smoke is still around. Pollution aint nowhere further.

Anger used to be the way I led my life, but then one day I just realized that anger is such a tiring and wasteful feeling. So to speak in beauty's point of view. WRINKLES are formed. Nowadays surgeries like botox are done to remove these so-called wisdom lines. Thank God for modern technology I guess. I do wonder though...how were the old times? The Golden Age? When life was linean and sweet. Why did it turn its back on most of us now? Why did it just turn all sour on us?

No matter how long you think about that question...An answer will never turn up. Most of our questions about life only end up with theories. None proven.







&&my thoughts

Boring wednesday morning
I don't mean to sound negative, but I have a huge feeling that today will be majorly boring. I've tried asking everyone if they're free later and it seems like I'm the only bum that's free.

Everyone has something to do later and I feel so left out~ Oh well..let's hope something interesting pops up later. Today was alright. Went to the BF's house just now and bought some dvd's after.

I bought Madagascar 2 finally and it isn't quite what I expected. Not really all that funny. Yeah it was funny but not all what I expected. I expected a 'Oh my god I can't stop laughing' kinda funny but no. Unfortunately not.

I bought a few other dvd's as well but they're all at the BF's house. He borrowed them. Guess I'll be watching my dvd's tomorrow then. If I'm lucky enough, the baju kurung that my grandmother sent to the tailor is ready. Then I can finally see the finished product.

Its either that or my acceptance letter is out already. I'm kinda praying for both here. My parents have been on my case about the whole acceptance letter thing. What's the big deal anyways? Its not like I'm the one who's controlling the college.

As if I can just waltz into there and ask them to hurry their asses up..although I would love to, but hell no.

Its around 4.12am on a Wednesday now. Why am I not asleep yet? Its what red bull does to you. I know most of you guys are probably questioning my dimwitted decision to drink it at night and my answer is this..migrane + red bull= no more migrane.

Seriously it cures your headaches too. Apparently it energizes you right? And by energizing you, it takes away the migrane. It only works if your headaches are due to sleepiness or when you're really tired.

I just realized that I haven't gotten my school shoes and socks yet. Shit! Well I finally got something to do tomorrow. I'm looking for those that look like flats. Not the boring ol school shoes you see at those indian shops. Nothing against people who buy them there but I realized that they don't tend to last long. Not really the most durable shoes in the world. The pair that I'm getting has to last for two years. I have shopping for school shoes so it'll be a huge bummer for me if the pair that I buy goes bye bye.

Oh btw I can't really change the colour of my font cos I'm actually blogging on my phone. I really need to get myself a laptop. Are macbooks any good though? A few years ago, they weren't the best choice of laptops. But I've seen the one my aunt has and it doesn't seem too bad.

They do fix it here now too at the Kiulap apple shop, so I guess that can be considered. Its either a macbook or a dell. My dad already has an acer so I can't really get the same one. Its all about variety.

There are a number of things I wanna take off my to-do list. But the important things are to get atleast a B for my english this year, get my driving license by december and get myself a laptop.

Pretty hard to accomplish those cos they require alot of hard work. How does the license and laptop require hard work? I need to really work hard on persuading my parents to let me get both of those things.

Trust is'nt one of the many things that my parents have towards me. And I personally don't blame them at all. But I'm turning 18 this year and they can't really expect me to go on without a license forever. 3 important things to get done before the year does. Oh god I hope I get to complete all of em.

Anyways I'm getting really sleepy now, finally so I'm gonna get some shut eye. Night readers! Ciao bello.