My complexion!..Life's straining the happiness in me..
Have you guys ever felt like noone, not even your closest friend understands the way you really feel inside? Well if you have, you will understand the way I'm feeling now. There are so many questions in my head right now and searching for the answers is wreaking havoc on me. Life's been stressful ever since national day practice. No doubt, I have to catch up on my studies cos I have been escaping alot of extra classes lately. What's the point of going anyways? After national day practice I would be too tired to even think or do anything else! I just need time to relax myself and give myself a lil break. I wish I could just go for a short holiday in Singapore or something. I miss the food there. The food here is crap~ It's as if all the restaurants here are de-grading they're food! I so need to go to the beach (Like Shar said) cos it's the only place where I can scream the stress and troubles away. National day practice is not doing my complexion any good either. Yes, it helps me exercise more and lose weight, but my God! There are so many other ways! It's like we have to practice under the hot sun! Even on the actual day, we have to do it in the morning in our baju kurung! How stupid is that?!Do they have any idea how hard it is to do the stupid dance in our baju kurung?! They never think of our feelings! I know this is for the country and all, but do we really need to do this? COMPULSORY?! I don't think so. Thank God I could go out with Abi and Fahme yesterday to relax at Gadong. We chilled out at ws as usual and first, I bumped into Hary and I was hoping that he would you know, sit down and chill out, but obviously, he saw Abi and Fahme there, so yeah. After him, I saw Kenny! He's panat. Ha! Ha! He sat down and we talked for awhile. He's so crazy! He keeps making me laugh non-stop. I don't think I stopped laughing for even a second through that one hour. When I got home, I found out that Shar really had love probs. Her thing with M aint going too well cos she found out that he had a gf already actually, but he said that he's attracted to her (Shar). I mean how stupid can guys be at times? Well sometimes it isn't they're fault either cos Love is complicated!! I just dont get it sometimes. Like why does everything have to be so complicated?! As I was once told, "It's the little bumps in life that makes life interesting." It helps us learn, I guess, but I don't really know what I'm supposed to learn from this life I'm living. Considering everything I've gone through, I guess..I have learned quite a number of things, but I get so sick of it sometimes and I feel like just kneeling down and beg for a break. A time just for me, a time where I don't have to worry or think about any problems! People think that I'm happy just cos I get everything I want, but in fact, NO that's not true! That has never been true. There are just so many problems I have by living this life. Nothing's free you know. *sigh* What can I do right? Things happen for a reason. That's my question..What's the reason?! &&Hardened Heart
